The Library Lady is Concerned – About Online Dating

As I’ve mentioned before, I work in a large public library.  The operative word here is Public, as in not private.  Also meaning that when you use the computers everyone can see what you’re doing whether they want to or not.

It’s become apparent to me that many people use the library computers for online dating activities.  Now let me be the first to say that I am intrigued by this whole phenomenon, and know several people who have met and married their soul mate thanks to online dating sites. Unfortunately, one must be very careful – you never know who you’re talking to and therein lies the problem.  I suspect that in many cases if you could actually see who you were chatting with, you’d stop.

I hesitate to go into detail and be criticized for judging  by appearances, but some of these hopeful swains have multiple red flags waving around their heads. Here are four examples:

1.Very large and flashy ring on wedding finger.

2. Extreme hygiene issues.

3. Apparent emotional, or substance abuse problems.

4. Appear to be much older than the cute young things whose faces appear on the  screen. (Remember I said these are public computers, and everyone can see.) Sigh.

In conclusion I just want  say, ladies, please be careful.  Don’t fall too hard for a guy you’ve never seen and may know nothing about.  When and if you meet them, make sure you meet  in a safe place. Also, make sure they have friends and family that they’re willing Introduce you to. Because there’s a downside to online dating –  some of these potential suitors may be misrepresenting themselves, either physically, socially, or in every way it’s possible to do so.

But now that I’ve said this, something occurs to me.  Maybe the cute young thing on the  computer screen is also  misrepresenting herself.  Hmmm. I guess it works both ways.

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12 thoughts on “The Library Lady is Concerned – About Online Dating

  1. I dabbled in a little online dating back in the day. Luckily everyone I met was more or less who they portrayed themselves to be–there’s always that urge to post a picture of yourself when you were ten pounds lighter or had a little more hair 🙂

  2. Don’t let me scare you away from online dating all together. As I mentioned, I know several people who had wonderful online dating experiences. Just be careful and don’t get too emotionally involved before you know who your dealing with.

  3. You would think, after all the PR and TV shows about this sort of thing that people — women in particular — would be more sensible and cautious. We don’t seem to be good at learning from the experience of others. Sigh.

  4. Hopefully my concerns are not necessary, and that the girls on the other end are being smart and not falling for creeps. I definitely think this is here to stay, as I just herd on the news tonight that 1 in five couples meet online now.

  5. Sadly, I have participated in this social arena, and it is mostly distasteful. So much deception, and many with baggage that drags them down. And, those photographs.., well I do witness that I was taken aback one time as I met a woman that was easily 10-15 years older than her posted photo. And, I have been on so called Christian sites, and they are no better than others.. Good luck to those who have had positive results, but I fear compromises have been made in too many times…

  6. It’s too bad, because if both parties are honest this is a really good way to met people. Much safer than picking someone up in a bar etc. The bottom line is, you just have to be careful and cover all the safety bases.

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