Lost and Found

businessmanI work in a busy public library and am constantly amazed by the variety of things people leave behind.  For instance, car keys – we have on average 4 sets of car keys in our lost and found drawer at all times. Can somebody please tell me how you get home without your car keys?  Don’t you need them to start your car?

Another popular item is cell phones – a big-ticket, stress inducing item to lose track of.  I always feel bad about this and try to answer the phones whenever I hear them singing their sad little lost song in the drawer.  Often it’s the owner calling from someone else’s phone trying to locate their own.  “You left it in the library!” I say, and we have a good laugh and the mystery is solved.

Much harder to resolve and equally traumatic is the instance of people who leave their flash drives in one of our computers.  I’ve been there done that, and I know how it feels. People store important information on those tiny bits of technology – things  like business proposals, midterm notes, personal journals, and final drafts of their novels.  It’s like back in the day when everyone carried planners.  You lose it and you lose your mind.

We also deal in lost coats – last check we had three, backpacks and shoes – did you really not notice you were missing a shoe? Canes, we’ve found four over the past year and they’re all alike.  We suspect it’s the same person losing them, but have yet to catch the owner in the act of abandonment.

But all these things pale in the face of the Grand Champion of lost and found items. One day at closing we were astounded to find a  brand new, state of the art, convertible double stroller, sitting all alone in the children’s section.

What?  Someone entered the library with a giant double stroller and managed to leave without it? Poor  young mothers, I feel for you.  I know, sometimes life with young children gets so stressful that you’d forget you own head if it wasn’t attached. (But seriously, your stroller? That’s more important than your head.)

Anyway this particular story  had an interesting ending.  One day a young man came into the library and glanced at the stroller collecting dust in the manager’s office. He skidded to a halt and stared.

“Excuse me,” he said, “but I think that’s our stroller. We lost it a few weeks ago, and my wife thought someone had stolen it.”

No, not stolen, just forgotten.  I hope he broke it to her gently. In conclusion, the stroller and it’s owners were happily reunited, and our manager has his office back – for now anyway.

Are you missing your eyeglasses, your wallet, your trumpet or your wedding ring?  Can’t find your notebook, your credit card or your soccer shin guards? Check out the library. Books aren’t the only things we collect.

Dog On It – Lucy and the Library Lady

dog reporter 2Not long ago I read a post where the blogger was interviewed by her cat.  For the life of me I can’t remember the name of the blog or I’d link it, but my dog Lucy got wind of the idea and wouldn’t rest until I let her have a go.  I’ve recently  gotten behind on award thank-you’s,  so I thought I’d combine them and do one interview to answer the required but difficult conditions of talking about myself.  Lucy, my faithful companion will now conduct the interview.

Lucy:  Ahhhhemmm.  So, Library Lady . . .  who is favorite family member?

LL:  Oh that’s easy, my husband John.

Long pause and stink-eye from interviewer

Lucy: Are you sure about that ?

LL: Yes, of course.

Lucy: And who, might I ask, takes John for walk everyday and makes sure he doesn’t get lost, and who has also learn to fetch newspaper so you don’t have to go out in snow every morning?

LL: That would be you, but my answer is still John. He’s my husband.

Lucy: But – but I am dog! – spluttering noises –  I am highly offended!

LL. Well I’m sorry, but you shouldn’t even ask questions like that, I mean I love you too but – wait a minute. What kind of interview is this anyway?  We’re supposed to be talking about me. Here, have a dog treat and try to calm down.

Crunching noises.

LL: Don’t forget your crumbs.

Lucy:  O.K. we try again.  Tell me ten things you like to do in  non-work time:

LL: Now, that’s more like it. I like to read, go for walks, watch old movies – preferably with Cary Grant, Omar Sharif, or Sean Connery type actors. I like to go out to restaurants, especially Mexican or Chinese.  I like to hang out with family and  friends, and travel, and sing in the choir.  I like Chocolate chip cookies right out of the oven with a glass of cold milk . . . whew, three more to go . . . I like to go to the ballet, and ride horses, and I used to ski until it got too expensive. There!

Lucy: You like to throw ball for dog don’t you?

LL: Of course there is almost nothing I’d rather do.

Lucy: Raised eyebrows and perked up ears.

LL: Not now though.

Lucy: Sigh. You also like to sit in messy room and stare at box.

LL:  Messy room . . . the office?  Oh, you mean writing! Yes I love to write.

Lucy:  Stare at box is called writing?

LL: The box is a computer, and I’m not just staring, I’m thinking.  I’m creating characters and dialogue, and story lines.

Lucy: Looks to me like sit with butt in chair and forget about favorite dog.

LL:  Aww – pat, pat –  I never forget about you, but you have to admit you’re asleep most of the time.

Lucy:  True, I easily bored, like now. Let’s go for  walk.

LL: O.K. but first I’d like you to type this up and post it.

Lucy:  Check. You want pictures?

LL: Yes, just make sure you show my best side.

Lucy: No problem.

BEST SIDE

BEST SIDE

SELFIE

SELFIE

dog reporter 2Now for the rest of the story.  The following are some of my favorite bloggers (ie, great writers and my most loyal commenters). They also nominated me for some blog awards.  Thanks guys! Check out their FANTASTIC blogs.

http://zainabjavid.wordpress.com/ (Dragon Loyalty Award)

http://livingwithshadows.wordpress.com/ (Also Dragon Loyalty)

http://vakunzmann.wordpress.com/ (Sunshine Award)

http://audreyhepburnbooks.wordpress.com/ (Also for the Sunshine Award)

http://kateloveton.wordpress.com/ ( Versatile Blogger Award, and the Sisterhood of world Bloggers)

Now here’s some more of my favorites:

http://mwaycott.wordpress.com/

http://kindnessblog.com/

http://jenniferwindram.com/

http://letscutthecrap.wordpress.com/

http://teepee12.com/

http://myliteraryquest.wordpress.com/

http://oldestdaughterredheadedsister.com/

http://shonthumb.wordpress.com/about/

Thanks everyone for  your support.  I love your blogs and appreciate  all your good words!

Sequel To: They Can Hear You

To catch up, read -They Can Hear You in There  https://geanieroake.wordpress.com/2013/09/23/they-can-hear-you/

Laughing Man 6

My friend recently acquired a job at a Taco Time and she confirms our theory that yes indeed,  they can hear you in there.  Apparently she and her co-workers have heard some very interesting exchanges through the drive up speaker. Everything from family feuds erupting over menu options, to the startling details (names included) of a local celebrity’s extramarital affair.

The one  they most recently got the giggles over  was a couple ordering a Big Juan burrito

Man: “I think I’ll have one of them Big Ju-on burritos.”

Wife:“Big Ju-On? What’s a Big Ju-on?”

Man: “I think its one a’ them Spanish names, like Jo-zay.” (They think he meant Jose.)

Listen up fast food patrons of the world.  That little speaker is a two-way affair.( Sort of.) Even if no one seems to be at the other end of the crackling metal box, don’t believe it.  The whole idea is for the employee on the other end to be able to hear what’s being said in your car.

Now, does it strike anyone else as odd, that while they can often hear every word we say,  we can’t hear them? My end of a fast food conversation always sounds like a cell phone  breaking up.

Fast food employee: “Welcome to . . static, gargle, fizz . . . “your order?”

Me:  “Yes, I’d like a hamburger, fries and a drink, please.”

FFE:  “Was that a . . . feedback, strangle,  crackle . . . and a drink?”

Me: “Uh, yes – I think so.”

You never know what you’ll end up with.  Instead of mystery meat, it’s mystery meal.

Anyway, I would be annoyed by this issue, but I  think I’m on to them.  They do it on purpose.  I used to work at one of these places when I was a teen, and believe me you don’t want to hear what’s going on at their end. ( I distinctly remember my friend riding his motorcycle into the kitchen one night when the manager was foolish enough to call in sick.)  Take it from one who’s been there, when it comes to the details of fast food preparation, ignorance is bliss.

Now, I am aware that by divulging these dark secrets of the fast food world, I have made the lives of the employees vastly less entertaining.  I apologize for that, but not for this expos’e. It was something that simply  had to be revealed, and if the Wahington Post wants to take this and run with it, they have my blessing. We could call it Deep Fry, or maybe Deep Float – as in rootbeer.

Remember, they can here you in there. Beware, if you care.

http://suzie81.wordpress.com/2013/10/31/halloween-blog-party/

Humor: They Can Hear You

Laughing Man 6
The other day I was running errands with my daughter.  We decided to make a quick stop at the local Starbucks, and pulled up to the drive-in window.  Over the intercom we heard a polite voice say, “Thank you for coming to Starbucks, we’ll take your order in a moment.” Then the speaker clicked off, and we settled in to wait our turn.

My daughter it seems has inherited my warped sense of humor, and to pass the time, she regaled me with a dead on impression of her teachers annoying throat clearing tic. I couldn’t help but laugh, and followed up with a reenactment of a co-worker’s heart stopping sneeze – I swear her head will fly off one of these times.  By now we were both laughing so hard we were crying, especially after my daughter threw in a few well-timed snorts to up the ante. Continue reading

Humor: Night of the Tarantula or, The Spider Transport Theory

MH900084164My son believes that all creatures have the right to a long and happy life, and that even spiders who have wandered into the house should be gently transported back to the yard or garden from whence they came.

While I don’t always agree with this theory, I’m not entirely hard-hearted either. Largely due to repeated readings of Charlotte’s Web as a child, I’m willing to do my part to for the insect world and am happy to alert my son if a spider needs rescuing. I don’t intentionally step on ants, and I’ve been known to hold the door open and shoe flying things outside rather than resorting to more violent methods of dispatch. But even I have my limits, and these were sorely tested on the night of the tarantula. Continue reading

The Library Lady Raises Her Voice

The following is a reprint of my very first blog post.  This was before I had any followers – insert sad face – and no one saw it, and it just floated around in the twilight zone.  Today I’m giving it another chance.

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DISCLAIMER  –  Lest you get the wrong idea, I never have, nor do I intend in the future to write articles or blog posts that focus on the topic of . . . Urine.  I was reluctant to do so in my very first Library Lady installment, but I think you’ll agree if you read on, that the following post simply HAD to be written. Continue reading

About Us

 Library Lady:  To the casual observer I am a wife and mother of four, a Mormon, a freelance writer, and a great lover of books.To those with a little more imagination, I am the best friend of Rosie Bear, who has been with me since I was four years old.  There are two reasons for writing this blog.

1) As a freelance writer I have a major failing. I write what I want to write about, not necessarily what will sell.  Consequently many of my stories and articles have never found a home.  Now they have one.

2) Did I mention that I LOVE books? I’m lucky enough to be a bookaholic who works in a public library!  When I find a great book I want to share.  Now I can.

Rosie: To the casual observer I am a stuffed bear with one eye and fur that is mostly rubbed off.  To those with a bit more imagination, I am the best friend of the Library Lady. We have been reading together since we were little, and she asked me to help with her blog.  I love well written, Beary beautiful  children’s books, especially those about bears, and I’m happy to tell you about my favorites.  My Motto:  Read till your eye falls off!

We will alternate book reviews with, Life/Humor  posts, and update this blog whenever we have something to say ( which is often).  In the book review section we’ll talk about our current reads, or if nothing wonderful is happening in our reading life, we’ll review our favorites. The rest of the blog will be about life in general and the things that make us smile. Can’t wait to get started!